Last year we spent a month focusing on locus of control: the idea that in any situation you should identify what you can control and do something about it, and learn to let go of the things you cannot control. This month we are revisiting this basic concept and focusing on the "taking control" aspect. Those who have an internal locus of control in a situation can identify their influence on a situation and more likely to take action. Those who have an external locus of control often blame undesirable situations on other people or factors. If you catch yourself ever saying "it's not my fault that.." you are exhibiting an external locus of control. If you are complaining about a situation consistently but still staying in it, you are exhibiting an external locus of control. The important thing to remember is that you may have more of an influence on your situation than you think. Now granted you cannot control other people's actions but you can control how you react and communicate with others. Do you tell people how their actions affect you or how you feel? Are you openly communicative about your actions and intentions toward other people?
A great example of having more influence than you think would be if you hated your job. People with an external locus of control might make excuses about how "this is the only job I can get" or "I don't have the right skills for x, y, z" would leave it at that and would stay where they were. People who can identify an internal locus of control might start to explore other career options, network, educate themselves to make them more diverse or qualified, and seek new opportunities to do something different. Remember this result likely will not be instantaneous, I'm not telling you to quit your job right away but stay open minded and work within your values to identify where you want to be and what you want to do. Good people are out there looking to provide opportunities to hard-working individuals. "The Secret - Rhonda Byrne" identifies the first steps to using the Law of Attraction in your goal setting. The basic idea is that if you envision what you want, like we did in our January Theme of the Month vision boards, and open your mind to the possibility you will start to identify more and more opportunities to help you reach those goals.
So now we get to your role in all of this: taking responsibility. Once you have identified your internal locus of control it is time to take responsibility and take action. Each of our themes have been accompanied with a call to action - this month's challenge is to take responsibility for one thing every day:
-If something needs to be done even if it's not your job - do it or delegate someone to do it
-Pick up trash on the sidewalk
-Do all the dishes in the sink even if they're not yours
-This doesn't mean you have to do everything yourself
---Examine your priorities - how important is it for this to get done now? Or at all? Or by you?
---Making sure you are spending your energy on the right things is paramount to taking full responsibility
-If you wronged someone, or they feel you have wronged them - apologize, it's not about who's right or wrong - it is about respecting each other
-If you thought that someone understood your instructions only for them to perform the action incorrectly - take responsibility and learn to communicate more clearly
-If something bothers you enough that you feel the need to complain about it - do something about it!
So our challenge will be in two parts: first try to catch yourself using external locus of control language (complaining, blaming, negative) and flip your language to reflect what you can do about the situation or speaking away the things that are out of your control. Second, take responsibility for at least one thing every single day. It can be any of the examples above but as you start to change your language you will notice more opportunities to take control and take action.
While we are taking claim of our future consider: are you where you want to be? This process should involve an examination of every area of your life. Last month we identified behaviors and characteristics we thought were healthy and worked toward at least one healthy goal every day. If you are making progress toward your goals make sure to celebrate it and continue to push and grow. If you are not where you want to be examine why. Analyze your situation and see what you can do. Remember: "Choice not chance determines your destiny." - Aristotle
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